Types of positive and negative communication and how to avoid the latter

Communication is the answer to a successful marriage – but you already knew that! Whilst the absence of communication may be a leading cause of divorce, fulfilling your wedding vows is easier if your marriage is based on open communication.

Learning to communicate well with your partner and often is not as easy as it sounds, but it can help resolve problems before they start to affect your marriage.

Try to focus on the following:

Six Types of Positive Communication:

  1. Checking-in – To find out what is going on with you as a couple;
  2. Exploring – To clarify an issue;
  3. Working – To resolve an issue;
  4. Reporting – To share an event with each other or others;
  5. Witnessing – To share your own marriage experience; and
  6. Affirming – To verbalize mutual love and respect.

Six Types of Negative Communication:

  1. Denying – To avoid responsibility and disenfranchise my partner;
  2. Winning – To cope with the fear of losing;
  3. Avoiding – To avoid responsibility, difficulty or pain;
  4. Controlling – To control my partner or the situation;
  5. Placating – To achieve ‘peace at any price’; and 
  6. Protecting – To shield myself, my partner or our relationship from a feared reality.

No one is perfect, and there will likely be times when you or your partner succumb to using these types of negative communication. Notice when this happens, make amends and vow to make this the exception rather than the norm. Focus on 5 times more positive to the negative communication types and your relationship will grow!

Tune in next week for more interesting ideas and tips at Intentional-Relationship.com

Source: PREPARE/ENRICH couple workbook

#PREPARE/ENRICH is a customised online assessment tool that identifies each couples unique strength and growth areas. Based on their assessment results, a facilitator provides feedback sessions, helping couples to discuss and understand their results while teaching them proven relationship skills.

For more information on PREPARE/ENRICH or to simply set up a couple on the tool, please contact: www.prepare-enrich.com.au or call today (02) 9520 4049 #prepareenrich



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